Friend and Family Toolkit

If you are concerned a friend or family member might be in an abusive or unhealthy situation, this toolkit can help you when offering support.

It is important to know how to help a friend or family member if you are worried about them or concerned that they may be in an unhealthy relationship. It's also vital that you don’t put pressure on the person and that you let them make decisions for themselves.

The Toolkit

Know the Signs

Educate yourself on the signs of abuse, including physical, emotional, and financial. Understanding the complexities of abuse is the first step toward providing effective support.

Create a Safe Space

Let your friend or family member know that you are a safe and non-judgmental person to talk to. Ensure they feel comfortable sharing their experiences and emotions without fear of blame or shame.

Listen Actively

Sometimes, just being a listening ear can make a world of difference. Practice active listening, validate their feelings, and assure them that their experiences are important and valid.

Avoid Blame or Judgment

Remember, the victim is never to blame for the abuse. Avoid making judgmental statements or placing blame. Instead, focus on the support and understanding your loved one’s needs.

Offer Resources

Provide information on local and national resources such as helplines, shelters, and counselling services. Knowledge is power, and having access to these resources can empower your loved one to make informed decisions.

Encourage Professional Help

Suggest seeking professional support, such as counselling or therapy, for both immediate assistance and long-term healing. Encourage them to speak with a counsellor who specialises in domestic abuse.

Safety Planning

Work together to create a safety plan tailored to their needs. This may include identifying safe spaces, emergency contacts, and steps to take in case of immediate danger.

Maintain Regular Contact

Keep regular communication and check in on your loved one. Isolation is a common tactic in abusive relationships, and maintaining contact helps them feel connected and supported.

Respect Their Decisions

While it can be challenging, respect your loved one's decisions, even if they choose not to leave the abusive relationship immediately. Support them without judgment and be patient as they navigate their journey.

Report Abuse if Necessary

If you believe your loved one is in immediate danger, do not hesitate to report the abuse to the appropriate authorities. The safety of your friend or family member should always be the top priority.

Remember: You Are Not Alone

Supporting a loved one in an abusive relationship can be emotionally challenging, but you are not alone. Reach out to local support groups, counselling services, etc. for guidance and assistance.